Liverpool FC

Vying for the championship, and with the season drawing toward it’s conclusion, Liverpool had a crunch match with the mighty Chelsea down at Stamford Bridge in just one months time.

With transfer and injury worries the Liverpool manager, Rafa Benitez, had to find a new striker capable of scoring goals, and find one fast. He sent all his coaches and scouts out on a mission to find a new striker they could use for the crucial Chelsea fixture.

Days passed with not a sniff of a potential new recruit. Then Benitez got a call from one his most trusted Scouts.

“Boss, I’ve found a young lad, he’s terrific, a born natural, great ball skills, scores from any range and can bend it like Beckham. Trouble is we're in Baghdad !”

However, money and distance was no object. The 19 year old lad from Baghdad was whisked back to John Lennon Airport and he began a period of intense training with the mighty Liverpool squad.

Sure enough the fateful day came and the Liverpool travelled down to London for the match that was now to prove the championship decider.

The game went badly, with only 20 minutes of the match left to play, Chelsea had gone 3-0 up. Never looking like scoring, Liverpool seemed doomed. Benitez sat on the bench. With head in hands and the title slipping away he called the head coach over and took a gamble:

“Send the Iraqi lad on”.

Ahmed proved simply sensational. He put four past the Chelsea keeper in the dying minutes of the game – the final whistle blew and Liverpool were the new champions.

The crowd went mad. With champagne spraying, camera flashes popping and stewards holding back the ecstatic fans, Benitez ran to his new star player:

“Ahmed, Ahmed my boy! Absolutely fantastic. You’re made son, made! You can have anything you want – salary, cars, girls, the penthouse suite!”

Ahmed, still the shy and quiet lad from Baghdad, simply asked: “Can I call my Mum and tell of my good fortune?”

Despatched to the changing room for some peace, Ahmed telephoned his mother.

“Mum, Mum! You are never going to believe my tale. I went on with less than 20 minutes left to play, scored four goals and won the game for my team!”

“I am very pleased for you my boy – but don’t you want to hear about us, your family, and how we are managing to get by?”

“Yes Mum, please forgive me. I know things are hard for you, my blessed family. Please tell me of your day”.

“Ahmed, my boy, it has been truly awful. The family car has been blown up, your sister has been molested, your brother has been shot, your father has been coerced into joining a vicious gang of looters, I have been mugged and all of our most treasured possessions have been stolen”.

Ahmed was upset and felt ashamed that things had gone so badly wrong for his beloved family:

“Oh, my Mother. I am truly sorry to hear of your misfortune”.

“Sorry? SORRY!!!! It’s your bloody fault we all had to relocate to Liverpool”